Archive for December 16, 2008

GIVE ME MY TIME MACHINE, DAMN YOU!!

December 16, 2008

This is so important, I’m ripping off the entire news report.

Swiss watch found in 400-year-old tomb

Archeologists in China are baffled after finding a tiny Swiss watch in a 400-year-old tomb.

The watch ring was discovered as archeologists were making a documentary with two journalists from Shangsi town.

“When we tried to remove the soil wrapped around the coffin, a piece of rock suddenly dropped off and hit the ground with a metallic sound,? said Jiang Yanyu, former curator of the Guangxi Autonomous Region Museum.

“We picked up the object, and found it was a ring. After removing the covering soil and examining it further, we were shocked to see it was a watch.”

The time was stopped at 10:06am, and on the back was engraved the word “Swiss”, reports the People’s Daily.

Local experts say they are confused as they believe the tomb had been undisturbed since it was created during the Ming dynasty 400 years ago.

They have suspended the dig and are waiting for experts to arrive from Beijing and help them unravel the mystery.

Emphasis added by me.

400yearoldmicrowatch

There it is.

Proof time travel exists!

Now give me my goddammed machine so I can go back to 1960!!!

Apple’s Marketing Blunder Of 2009

December 16, 2008

youidiot

Apple CEO Jobs absent from Macworld lineup

With clarification and more details:

Apple Announces Its Last Year At Macworld, Steve Jobs Not Delivering Keynote

Hey, no one has to tell me the economy is total shit.

But this is huge mistake.

It telegraphs:

1) No Big New Product (goodbye, iPod Air/iPod Touchbook!)

2) It crushes the spirits of all Apple/Mac lovers

3) It leaves the field wide open for Palm to dominate the spotlight in January

Palm!

Can you imagine the near-maniacal exuberance that’s taking place in Palm HQ right now — as they realize they now have a clear field? As all those worries evaporate about Apple crushing their CES unveiling?

Here’s the reaction from Twitter … look at the progression!

appletweets12160801
appletweets12160802

It hit The New York Times!

And then the Big One:

appletweets12160803

Meanwhile over at Palm HQ:

hilarity
The Media Spotlight will be all ours!!!!

Blog Notes: Another Short Day

December 16, 2008

Weep or dance. Your choice.

I have an afternoon appointment that will probably devour the best blogging hours.

Only fifteen days left to this blog anyway.

Well, minus no-blog day of Christmas, only fourteen.

Chronicles Of Depression 2.0: #473: Addicts

December 16, 2008

Downturn Spurs “Survival Panic” for Some in the U.S.

A paralegal, recently laid off, wanted to get back at the “establishment” that he felt was to blame for his lost job. So when he craved an expensive new tie, he went out and stole one.

The story, relayed by psychiatrist Timothy Fong at the UCLA Neuropsychiatric Institute and Hospital, is an example of the rash behaviors exhibited by more Americans as a recession undermines a lifestyle built on spending.

In the coming months, mental health experts expect a rise in theft, depression, drug use, anxiety and even violence as consumers confront a harsh new reality and must live within diminished means.

“People start seeing their economic situation change, and it stimulates a sort of survival panic,” said Gaetano Vaccaro, deputy clinical director of Moonview Sanctuary, which treats patients for emotional and behavioral disorders. “When we are in a survival panic, we are prone to really extreme behaviors.”

Emphasis added by me.

That’s a smart move: adding a shoplifting arrest to your background check!

“We don’t buy products, we buy feelings,” Vaccaro said. “We’re buying the anticipation of the feeling that we think that product or service is going to give us.”

I can see what my future will be like.

I’ll be surrounded by tens of millions of insane bastards addicted to spending who are going out of their fucking minds from cold turkey withdrawal.

Many of you will die.

Many more of you will need killing.

If you can’t adjust to little money, you’re no damned good to yourself — or the human race.

How Writers Write Writing #2

December 16, 2008

deanlinestweets

Previously here:

This Is Your Sanity Prescription
How Writers Write Writing
Today’s Advice For Writers