The Zero-Gravity Toilet Of Adobe DRMed ePub
There’s a classic shot in the movie 2001: A Space Odyssey when the main character has to first consult instructions on how to use a zero-gravity toilet:
Imagine having to go through all that!
And yet — there is something actually worse than that.
It’s the instructions on how to go about using Adobe DRMed ePub eBooks!
Here are the Zero-Gravity toilet instructions:
Now contrast the amount of text there to instructions for using Adobe DRMed ePub:
Can you imagine the poor technically unsophisticated schmo having to deal with all that?
“For God’s sake, all I want to do is read eBooks!!!”
Really, it turns out it’s easier to take a shit in space than to deal with Adobe DRMed ePub eBooks!
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Mike Cane 2008 
December 27, 2008 at 7:56 pm
Oh, pfft. It’s *Adobe*. Color me not surprised.
I spent Christmas Eve (which, alas, I had to work), installing my lovely new CS4 upgrade. I figured it was a reasonable task for a day when I didn’t really need to be doing anything else.
It took all. day. I had to contact Adobe customer support twice and speak with a total of six representatives, starting with the frontline customer service person who answered the phone, working my way up to an “advanced” technical support specialist.
And why?
Because my (legitimately purchased) copy of CS3 was bought on a volume license, and my (legitimately purchased) copy of CS4 was purchased on an individual license, and the installer for CS4 refused to recognize the serial number of my copy of CS3. Yes, that is correct: Adobe freaked out because I went from the less expensive option to the more expensive option. (Because my employer stopped buying Adobe volume licenses.)
I have never not had a problem with Adobe. Adobe exists in the same mental space in my brain as Microsoft, except for I get the feeling that Microsoft cares more about its customers. And I’ve been an Apple devotee since 1985.
Someday, man, someday, there will be an adequate replacement for Photoshop, and I will drop Adobe like something I probably can’t call them in a public forum, and never look back.
December 27, 2008 at 8:08 pm
classic.
rotfl.
bravo.
December 29, 2008 at 1:13 pm
[…] contrast my happy GPS experiences to complexities of e-book DRM. Mike Cane has a hilarious post comparing Adobe DRM documentation to the hassles of puzzling out instructions for a zero-gravity toi…. Guess which is worse. Natch. And to think that Adobe is hoping to help create a DRM standard from […]
April 8, 2009 at 6:59 pm
[…] The Zero-Gravity Toilet Of Adobe DRMed ePubAs Mike Cane notes, Really, it turns out it’s easier to take a shit in space than to deal with Adobe DRMed ePub eBooks! […]
February 9, 2012 at 9:12 pm
It is a telling statistic that Almost All of the threads in the Adobe eReader support forums are about… DRM problems.